From the Introduction to Fork in the Road...

     Why would anyone attempt to write a book in the midst of going back to school and caring for three kids, a husband and a dog? I ask myself this all the time and here’s my answer: I felt committed to doing this because, from numerous conversations I’ve had, both with women I know well and with acquaintances, everyone from those I talk to casually at Bar and Bat Mitzvahs, to those friends I see on the sidelines of my kids’ field hockey and basketball games, to the gentle woman who owns the pizza parlor near the graduate school I attend, I have realized that there are many, many women who secretly yearn to go back to school, but are afraid. They are afraid of failure, of not knowing how to be a student anymore, of the changes it will cause in their family life, of not having the energy, of not being smart enough. Like me, many of these women feel that when they were young, for a variety of reasons, they were not able to take full advantage of their education. Sometimes, because they were girls and not boys, the education offered them was not adequate for the dreams they had for themselves. Frequently, these women now find themselves as stay-at-home moms whose children need them less and less and/or in uninspiring jobs that keep them afloat financially, but aren’t what they really want to do, what their heart tells them to do. I, therefore, felt an urgency to write this book, to reach out to those who need some extra support, as I did, to do this brave thing--turn their lives upside down and go back to school.

     So, this book is kind of an extended letter to you, the reader. It’s intended to offer you encouragement and advice as you take the important and scary step of going back to school. It is drawn from my own experience of making this life-changing decision. In my case, I returned to school to finish my undergraduate degree and am now working on my masters in marriage and family therapy. In doing all of this I learned much more than just about the subject matter I was studying; I learned about myself.

     My hope is that this book will provide you with some of the support you need to go back to school, to change career, to continue to flourish, to do what you need to do to find the fulfillment you may have postponed, but truly deserve. I hope you’ll consider this book a kind of tool box filled with ideas, techniques, strategies, to help you along your way. Through my relationship with Donna, I learned about the importance of company and connection. I also learned some very fun ways to approach something that has always scared me—writing. Here’s my story.

     In high school I was trying very hard to escape my teenage angst and therefore, didn’t have much time or energy for studying. Besides, it was the seventies, and the impact of the second wave of feminism was only beginning to be felt (at least in my circles), and my family still held more traditional views about women’s education. Part of me internalized this belief system. This was also reinforced by the fact that I was enrolled in an Orthodox synagogue where, because I was a girl, I was told that I couldn’t become a Bat Mitzvah and celebrate the beginning of adulthood, the way boys could¹. Despite all this, I always had a secret passion for learning. I knew this in high school when I took an English course in the summer and I had to read an entire book each night for four weeks. I didn’t want the class to end. It was then that I realized how much I loved the written word. It was sad to me that I found writing to be so hard, even excruciating, and that’s why, when I graduated from high school, I really didn’t think I had the skills to get through college.